Absurdity of the Best AP English Day

“I feel very happy” as I make my way to  AP English in an especially chipper mood, full of excitement for Carolyn, Haley and I to run AP English for a day (Wilde 29). Our plan consists of our putting our classmates and Ms. Serensky through ridiculous obstacles for our own personal entertainment. For starters I love the poem we decided to teach, “If” by Rudyard Kipling. It preaches the importance of making the most of time and staying true to oneself, a lesson we learned once again through reading Everything Matters! as a class.  Teaching the poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling led us to the decision to play a series of minute to win it games and we thus began to set them up in the correct order and getting the class into teams. First we began with the M&M game. The classroom filled with chaos as people pranced around the room grabbing at different colors of M&M’ and fitting their hands into tiny Dixie cups at rapid speed. After the commotion died down we started up the next game. When we arrived upon the cookie game, where the contestants received the task of wiggling a cookie down their face and into their mouths, Ms. Serensky rose up to test her cookie wiggling skills. Simple at first, “But for some reason it set us to laughing. It starts off slow, a couple little chuckles, then gathers momentum until we’re almost paralyzed by it” (Currie 252). Haley demonstrated her professional skills and got the cookie in her mouth with ease that can only come from the luckiest of instances. Then onto the sniffing cotton ball game which I happen to like the best. We explain that one must move the cotton balls with only their noses to across the room and we can immediately tell the entire class doesn’t “seem to get it strait in their mind[s]” (Kesey 196). More laughter erupts as we watch our usually quite setting fill with frantic individuals with cotton balls stuck up their noses. We then settled the atmosphere with a discussion led by lines from the poem and questions that pertained to the morals the poem advocates. As my favorite day in AP English we found a way to act absurd while still learning the importance of every minute.

McMurphy to Clive

Clive,

 I feel the need to express my opinion about the way you lived your life. After all here we both are, dead as a result of the paths we decided to take in life. Although, let’s be honest I went out in a heroic way in order to help out my ward. You, on the other hand should think over the events that led to your murder and the murder of your friend. Nothing came out of your double murders and I found them quite unnecessary. A real man, such as me, goes out for a cause and in doing so becomes a hero. Well enough about my heroic nature, I will cut strait to the point.  Now, I’m gonna get real weird with it because “I don’t seem able to get it straight in my mind…” why you copied Beethoven’s Ode to Joy (196). I’m a terribly good con man myself but I’m all sneaky when I go about it and nobody can call me out on a good con. So I find it hard to understand how you messed up so bad. I spent a great deal of time considering it a testament to your sanity,  but let me tell you I know insanity, lived around it for a good while and “As near as I can tell you’re not any crazier than the average asshole on the street”(65). With your sanity intact and your future on the line I cannot for the life of me understand your absurd choice to copy Ode to Joy.

            Well McMurphy, I am simply “a genius” (143). Before I came to the musical world “there had been no Beethovens” and I find myself just as talented at the great man himself (144). 

McMurphy's Discussion Domination

The whole class looks up at I strut in, late as usual and too cool to care. Ms. Serensky attempts to put me in my place, but I just smirk and find a seat. If I could take on Nurse Ratched, I can put up with anyone.  I take out a sharpie and scribble across the desk MCMURPHY to clear up any absurd thoughts that another could sit in the center seat.  A discussion begins as usual and though I have no idea as to what everyone mutters about I holler out whatever comes to mind and look for Ms. Serensky to put a mark next to my name. I go along with Henry in his declarations that Carolyn “loves nature” and just to mess with him I back Carolyn up when she tells him his “robot voice is terrible”. Discussion for points means a game, like poker, and one I plan to come out on top of.  I receive dirty looks from the others in the room but I couldn’t care less, I’m bigger and I could take any of them if a brawl over discussion points breaks out. Someone tries to cut me off and I snap, “This [discussion]…belongs to the strong, my friend!” (64). I feel even though my classmates don’t always seem as smart as me, they can make the inference that I am the strongest and thus they must follow my lead.  A few students look up and I can see the class does not quite understand my opinion about English and its brutal nature. Well I’ll clear it up for them. Our grades are “based on the strong getting stronger by devouring the weak. We must face up to this. No more than right that it should be this way” (64). My blunt statement sends the class into a tizzy. Everyone tries to get their opinion in, awkward instances when three people try to talk fill the air, people make pathetic apologies to each other, and I sit sickened by the civility.  Well I don’t care, everyone in the class “is a rabbit” anyways (64). I am a wolf, and I fully enjoy today, my best day in AP English.

Advice for AP English 11

Dear Omniscient Speaker,

            For one whom claims to not “know anything else” you sure seem to give great advice when Junior needs it and I believe the lessons you teach to Junior throughout his life greatly parallel the lessons of AP English 11 (9). In the beginning of junior year we know nothing and welcome everything. The declaration you make that states, “There is much to learn and do, and little time; suffice it to say that you should be aware of the trials ahead” pertains to AP English 11 greatly (3). It inspires motivation to not except the initial failures when we receive a 2+ or 3 on the first papers of the year. The advice urges one to remain calm and to trust Ms. Serensky knows the steps to get us to the AP test looming in the future.  True, we have little time and our awareness of the May test date keeps us on track. When assigned a soapstone for the first time I find your advice to work perfectly. Many would do well to “avoid those who complain about life’s unfairness, and instead get a head start on building self-restraint” (4).  At some point everyone rages about the infamous soapstone of AP English 11, yet one must build up their self-restraint so the insane datasheets of AP English 12 don’t throw one over the edge. Complaining about English does no good and one would do well to learn this early on.  Just as Junior goes back to begin his life again, we move on from the world of AP English 11 into the unknown of AP English 12 and I believe the best advice for the transition is “ You were wise to welcome Everything, the good and the bad alike”(292). The shift away from AP English 11 will seem scary at times, but the opportunity to further your knowledge greatly outweighs the initial fears.  The bad will motivate one to work harder and the good will come when preparation pays off after the AP tests.

                                                                                                Sincerely,

                                                                        An AP English student